Just in case you haven't heard, 'breast is best'. This message is rammed so far down your throat during pregnancy that you might start to think you are poisoning your child if you give them formula. I do agree that the studies indicate breast milk is better than formula, and it logically makes sense to me too. What bothers me is that I think little thought is given to the mother's mental health.
Exclusively breast feeding can be exhausting and tie you to your child 24-7. It can mean that you can't leave your house for 3 hours without your child. I have a friend who loves that about breast feeding as she has an excuse to always be with her son, and I think that is trully wonderful. For me though, I need time to myself. I have always needed solitude. I also love the outdoors and being physically active. Luckily I have been able to express and leave my bub with a bottle so her dad or another carer can feed her. If you can't express though, then the only option is formula, or being permanently attached to your child.
About half the time of my ante-natal class was devoted to explaining why breast is best. Each person was given an item and had to explain what that item might indicate about the benefits of breast feeding. We got a stethoscope and the benefit was that your child is healthier so you spend less time at the doctors. One girl got a packet of the contraceptive pill. Erm... no, breast feeding is not a contraceptive! If you are trying to fall pregnant it might be a hindrance, but there are certainly a lot of breast feeding mums who fall pregnant. What annoyed me about this little exercise was that we didn't discuss the negatives of breast feeding, or even the positives of formula. So I would like to do that here. Here are some of the negatives that people don't really talk about:
* Engorgement. Why did nobody tell me about this? (OK one person did but she complained that nobody had told her)
* babies get teeth eventually.
* If you can't express, you can't leave your baby for more than 2-3 hours
* Your partner misses out on the bonding opportunity that feeding provides
* You might feel like a dairy cow - whenever I worry about things such as 'my supply' or when I hand express into a cup, I start to feel a little bovine.
* You have to get your boobs out all the time in public. A lot of people talk about how women should be made to feel comfortable feeding in public. The thing is, it isn't other people that make me uncomfortable. I never worry that other people will find it rude or offensive, I just don't like pulling up my shirt to expose my now flabby tummy. My daughter also likes to unlatch and look around a lot, just letting any passerby see my nipple. There are shawls and covers and these are great, but if my daughter is totally cracking it for a feed, I don't want to mess around, I get her straight to the boob.
* Your boobs keep changing size. I went and spent $180 on new sports bras and then my supply (moo) settled down a bit and my boobs got smaller. Awesome.
* Leakage. Sometime you don't just leak, you squirt milk like a sprinkler. Too bad if you forgot about putting nursing pads in your bra that day.
And here are some benefits of formula:
* Anyone can feed your baby!!! FREEDOM!
* Your partner has an additional opportunity for bonding with bub
* You can give formula cold. You can pre-prepare it, so it seems pretty convenient
* Your baby will go longer between feeds as it takes longer for them to digest formula
All up, I still choose to breast feed. I breast feed because it is free, my daughter's poos are far less offensive to the nose and it seems to be the healthier option. I have no issues expressing though. I might choose to mix feed if that was an issue for me. I would definitely be considering the importance of my mental health if I had to be permanently attached to my baby.
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